Teacher Humor

So I was surfing education blogs to find lesson plan inspiration yesterday when I came across this little gem. Not on a teacher site, but cafe press (Yes, I'll admit I was multi-tasking and trying to find presents for my secret santa). I am in love. It is my life right now. And every teacher out there will immediately get the joke, for there are those days when you just have to wing it and pretend everything is O.K.  

For the love of teaching....

I'm getting personal here. Right now you could say I'm in a funk. I'm not happy with my job--in fact you could say right now I resent it--big time. I resent that it is taken over my life. My brain is always on teaching. My desk at work is full of mountains of papers to correct or pass out. All I talk to my husband about is what crazy, stupid thing some of my 9th grade boys did. I don't look forward to school because I know I must tackle more and more.

Don't get me wrong.  I love teaching--it is all I've ever wanted to do, my passion. I love teachers, my kiddos, seeing students light up when they get a concept, decorating my classroom, even working on curriculum. I will talk theory with the best of best, mentor, join book clubs on educational topics... you name it. I will tout my kiddos accomplishments till the cows come home. I guess you could call me a "teacher nerd" and I love it.

I know that when I choose this profession (dare I say it chose me?) that it would become a defining part of my identity. That my life would be about other peoples children, giving up my time to chaperone field trips, advise clubs, attend football games and school musicals, write curriculum, and finding out what is best for my students learning, not my teaching style. It is who it I am, who I want be, and I totally accepting of it. But for the love of  all things high school, I would love to do something without feeling guilty about the ungraded papers, the lesson that needs tweeked, journal articles, or goals that await me.    

What do I mean? I want to be able to work at decorating my house, put my son to bed,  finish the book on toddler behavior I've been reading for months, or talk to my sister on the phone without feeling guilty about the stack of papers I left on my desk. I want to drink a cup of tea and watch my favorite tv show on Sunday night without doing something lesson plan related.  To peruse Pinterest without pinning dozens of class ideas. The list goes on and on.

I know that life is about balance, but what is it about teaching and feeling guilty about having a life outside of school? We are not superheros, we are human and we need to take time for ourselves. I know I do, but right now, I'm not. I have to start taking time for me, but it so hard to do when you are pulled in so many directions. I'm up for suggestions if you have any, because right now I am suffering.

You know your a teacher when....

I'm guessing that many of you may have already seen this... especially my teacher friends, but it gets me every time. Thanks to one of my "blog stalks" (favorites) for this.  http://oldschoolteach.wordpress.com


HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU’RE A TEACHER? By Jeff Foxworthy

1. You get a secret thrill out of laminating things.
2. You can hear 25 voices behind you and know exactly which one belongs to the child out of line.
3. You walk into a store and hear the words, “It’s Ms./Mr. ____________ and know you have been spotted.
4. You have 25 people who  accidentally call you Mom/Dad at one time or another.
5. You can eat a multi-course meal in under 25 minutes.
6. You’ve trained yourself to go to the bathroom at two distinct times of the day, lunch and planning period.
7. You start saving other people’s trash, because most likely, you can use that toilet paper tube or plastic butter tub for something in the classroom.
8. You believe the Teacher’s Lounge should be equipped with a margarita machine.
9. You want to slap the next person who says, “Must be nice to work 7 to 3 and have summers off”.
10. You believe chocolate is a food group.
11. You can tell if it’s a full moon without ever looking outside.
12. You believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says, “Boy, the kids are sure mellow today.”
13. You feel the urge to talk to strange children and correct their behavior when you are out in public.
14. You believe in aerial spraying of Ritalin.
15. You think caffeine should be available in intravenous form.
16. You spend more money on school stuff than you do on your own children.
17. You can’t pass the school supply aisle without getting at least 5 items!
18. You ask your friends to use their words and explain if the left hand turn he made was a “good choice” or “bad choice.”
19. You find true beauty in a can full of perfectly sharpened pencils.
20. You are secretly addicted to hand sanitizer.
21. You understand, instantaneously, why a child behaves in a certain way after meeting his/her parents.

I hope all my teacher friends, parents, colleagues, and students have had a great start to a new school year. Remember teachers are humans who love their jobs and your kids :)

It's Graduation Time :)

Every year I look forward to graduation--to watch my senior students walk across the stage and receive their high school diplomas. I see the joy and excitement on their faces as they close one chapter and begin a new one in their lives. It makes me blessed to be part of their journey. So as my current students get ready to cross the stage and my former kiddos who have already done so last week... for you.

“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You're on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who'll decide where to go...”
― Dr. Seuss, Oh, the Places You'll Go!

  

To the 2012 graduates of Western and my HHS seniors... congratulations! I'm so very proud of you.  

Why I teach.

There are days when I ask myself this question--and as sure as April turns to May (and then June), I find myself asking it over and over. Maybe it is because I teach high school and I am surrounded by teenagers most of the day; sponsor teenage activities, go to high school sports and so on--I get to ‘live’ high school all the time. Or it maybe that my students senioritis has finally begun to affect me and I find that my patience for them and their lack of motivation is driving my nuts.  It may also be because being a teacher, a really good teacher, is reaching out to kids who-- all ages, levels and abilities and making learning personal to them--which can be SO hard to do.

I became a teacher because I wanted students to be excited about learning. Once I realized that learning was about how to do things and not remembering random ideas and facts, it became easier and made more sense, more practical. I know many of my students question whether they will ever use the information I teach again--especially since I teach social studies. Hopefully one day one of my students will watch the news and see what is going on in the world and say... "hey, we talked about this in class." Or that they will vote and become active citizens in the process.  I work hard to help my students (and now my own)  make sense of the world we live in, where we come from and where we could go. It's such an incredible challenge, so when a student ‘gets it’ or really embraces the ideas, it is amazing and rewarding, and wonderful. It's what makes the job of teaching so much fun and at the same time, so exhausting.

Today marks twenty eight days (if you include the weekends) until school lets out for summer. Yes I have a countdown... most teachers do (even if they don't say it out loud). It seems like a long time, but it isn’t. The time will vaporize before my eyes and then it will be summer vacation--but it will too go so fast, and I’ll be back prepping for and working with kids again next fall.  But today, as the seniors enjoy their class trip and my freshmen review for the state SOLs – I will take the time to stop and appreciate just how far my kiddos have come. Today will go by so quickly and I won't get it back-- I had better make every minute count.

Does this make me a bad teacher?

So yeah... I teach high school social studies for those of you who don't know. Advanced Placement Government and Politics to seniors and World History to freshmen to be exact. I have been teaching seniors for the last 8 years of my career and I love it--until senioritis sets in. Then there is nothing more frustrating than seniors. Admit it--you all remember your senior year of high school--trying to focus (especially after you were accepted to college), warm weather, spring break, counting the days till graduation--your brain just turned to mush. As a teacher of seniors I dread it. Kids can become so unproductive and I feel like I'm herding cats most days. Why am I writing this then? Today was different... what happened you may ask? Well... let me tell you.

My 7th block AP Government seniors are really a great group of kids. Smart, kind, intelligent, and really want to know about things. I really enjoy discussions with them because they contribute so much and they love to learn. But today to my surprise we flew through things--what took me 90 minutes to do with others, took me 65. So what to do? W-e-lllllll.... How about turning off the lights, blasting some wave and rain sounds from the computer, and having some relaxation time with some deep breathing and mental exercises to go with. YEP. That's right... we relaxed, or mainly they did. Can't be sure, but I even think a couple of kids actually fell asleep. All I know is that as the bell rang, my kids jumped up relaxed, refreshed and so appreciative--for the time to slow down and just be. In this busy, rush-rush time my kids reminded me that it's ok to stop and relax. So if taking time out of my day to relax with them makes me a bad teacher, then I guess I am.

An Open Letter to my favorite teachers...

To all my former teachers and current friends (who just happen to be teachers too)--

How can I thank you for not only instilling me in me the love of learning, but for setting the most amazing example of what it means to be a gifted and caring teacher? I have always tried to make my kiddos feel about learning and love the way you made me feel. It is because of you that I am who I am today--a teacher.

Some of my most cherished moments of school are the amazing projects you enabled me to do. I remember running home to share my newest Letter People or waiting with anticipation to find out the Biology cheer of the week. I remember being given the gift of music through singing and playing in the orchestra--honors choir performances, tryouts, musicals, and my favorite spring show every year. I remember fundraising my tail off to attend one of the most amazing hands on experience in government (i.e. Close-Up) in Washington D.C I have ever been to or watching you stand on a desk, shouting the words to the preamble of the Constitution, just to make a point. I think it was during those days that I developed my LOVE of all things politics and history.

I also probably owe a much belated thank you for all the hours of tutoring in math, chemistry, and physics many of you did just so I could get my B. Or an apology for trying to cheat on my spelling test in 5th grade because I was so scared that I wouldn't be able to spell the word neighbor. I swear to this day, that is the only time in my life I have ever tried to cheat-- and getting caught was most likely the best lesson I could ever learn--plus now I know how to spell neighbor and neighborhood to this day without batting an eye! It was a difficult lesson to learn then and one that I have to teach more than a few of my own students now.

And to those of you now who give me such inspiration--can I just say that you ROCK!?! Where else can I feel safe in my "social studies bubble" or vent my problems out and know that someone will be there to give me a hug or better yet chocolate and a Dr. Pepper. Who else can save the day with an lesson plan, help me through the day with an understanding smile, hold my head when I  get sick at school (yes folks, it's happened to me more than once!) or celebrate a students' success? You give of yourselves--not only to me--but to kids. You chaperone field trips, dances, and share in a perfect moment of graduation...and so much more. You really are the Bees Knees!! If only more people could see you the way I do...

Thank you!!!

Love always,
Kate