Be My Valentine--Marriage Challenge

Confession time here. I'm not a big Valentine's Day person. I don't like all the commercialism, and I don't like the fact that we spend all this time and money to show our spouse/significant other how much we care for and love them on Feb. 14th. So here's my question... why just one day? Why not every day? Granted I would gain a thousand pounds if my husband brought me chocolate everyday (in theory--I would probably die of happiness since chocolate is one of my favorites) but really folks--we need to show our love, gratitude, and support more often.

Enter Women Living Well. They are hosting a 4 week challenge for Valentine's Day. The point -- to praise, encourage, inspire, admire, build up, thank, and appreciate our husbands, partners, and significant others-- and that, in my opinion, is a challenge worth taking.

Now let me explain... this is going to be a big deal for me. In our busy, rush-rush, trying to balance work, marriage, and an extremely active 2-1/2 year old world, true conversation with my husband is reduced to almost nothing. I mean nothing says I love like "will you please pick up your ties" or "Can I please get some help over here!", and don't even get me started on all the socks laying all over the house.... More often than not I don't give my husband enough credit for the wonderful things he does do-- like bath time with Duncan, his famous back-rubs, or even taking the time to empty the dishwasher.

This being week one of the challenge, I have jumped in full force. I've "pimped" my husband out on facebook thanking him for spending time with us on our surprise snow day Thursday; I've worked hard to find at least one thing a day to thank him for daily... and it's working. I am not only working on my appreciation, but I find that I'm beginning to see just how much he does in our marriage. And he really is a wonderful man.

I am so up for this challenge. How about you? Are you willing to work on your marriage as I am? I ask that you pray for me as work to show just how much I love and care for my husband every day--not just one day of the year.  If you are, let me know and we can do it together.

Here are this weeks details....

Week 1: January 21st-27th - Look for ways to praise your husband verbally. Praise him in front of the kids, friends, family, co-workers, on facebook, tweet it - get praise out anyway you can. Be sure to mention noteworthy things he does -- as a provider, a father, husband, lover, friend, and partner. Say something kind and loving to your husband everyday until Valentine's Day arrives and beyond!

An Open Letter to my favorite teachers...

To all my former teachers and current friends (who just happen to be teachers too)--

How can I thank you for not only instilling me in me the love of learning, but for setting the most amazing example of what it means to be a gifted and caring teacher? I have always tried to make my kiddos feel about learning and love the way you made me feel. It is because of you that I am who I am today--a teacher.

Some of my most cherished moments of school are the amazing projects you enabled me to do. I remember running home to share my newest Letter People or waiting with anticipation to find out the Biology cheer of the week. I remember being given the gift of music through singing and playing in the orchestra--honors choir performances, tryouts, musicals, and my favorite spring show every year. I remember fundraising my tail off to attend one of the most amazing hands on experience in government (i.e. Close-Up) in Washington D.C I have ever been to or watching you stand on a desk, shouting the words to the preamble of the Constitution, just to make a point. I think it was during those days that I developed my LOVE of all things politics and history.

I also probably owe a much belated thank you for all the hours of tutoring in math, chemistry, and physics many of you did just so I could get my B. Or an apology for trying to cheat on my spelling test in 5th grade because I was so scared that I wouldn't be able to spell the word neighbor. I swear to this day, that is the only time in my life I have ever tried to cheat-- and getting caught was most likely the best lesson I could ever learn--plus now I know how to spell neighbor and neighborhood to this day without batting an eye! It was a difficult lesson to learn then and one that I have to teach more than a few of my own students now.

And to those of you now who give me such inspiration--can I just say that you ROCK!?! Where else can I feel safe in my "social studies bubble" or vent my problems out and know that someone will be there to give me a hug or better yet chocolate and a Dr. Pepper. Who else can save the day with an lesson plan, help me through the day with an understanding smile, hold my head when I  get sick at school (yes folks, it's happened to me more than once!) or celebrate a students' success? You give of yourselves--not only to me--but to kids. You chaperone field trips, dances, and share in a perfect moment of graduation...and so much more. You really are the Bees Knees!! If only more people could see you the way I do...

Thank you!!!

Love always,
Kate

This is a test... it is only a test...

This week has been a test--of my patience, organization, and sanity! Between a "small" snow storm that ended up dumping 7 inches here in 7 or so hours (really unusual here), prepping for my senior students class project--yes that mean all 250 some seniors will be participating in this shin-ding on Friday (and I am one for 4 teachers coordinating this thing), trying to get lesson plans made, spend time with my husband and child, cook and take care of things around here--I might just flip out. But then I remember that I am a super hero in training and this is just a test, it's only a test and if I can just find my calm, relaxed, centered self, all will be ok.

So to help remind me that all things come in due time and with patience all things are possible, I went looking for some quotes. Here are a few I copied for myself, and hopefully they will help you too. Enjoy and may we all have a wonderful rest of the week.

• Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish.
  John Quincy Adams
• Making your mark on the world is hard. If it were easy, everybody would do it. But it's not. It takes patience, it takes commitment, and it comes with plenty of failure along the way. The real test is not whether you avoid this failure, because you won't. it's whether you let it harden or shame you into inaction, or whether you learn from it; whether you choose to persevere.
  Barack Obama
• Everything comes gradually and at its appointed hour.
  Ovid
• Have patience with all things, But, first of all with yourself.
  Saint Francis de Sales
• You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.
  Franklin P. Jones
• A man who is a master of patience is master of everything else.
  George Savile
• Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.
  Harriet Tubman
• For anything worth having one must pay the price; and the price is always work, patience, love, self-sacrifice - no paper currency, no promises to pay, but the gold of real service.
  John Burroughs

Gratitude Check (a.k.a. my 100 things)

I have been reading up on blogging and writing in general. One of the books I've been looking at suggested to help find inspiration; make a list of one hundred things that you love.  It is supposed to encourage the "writer" to think/write the obvious (anything chocolate) and not so normal (watching a squirrel run on the back fence).  The end product is a wonderful list of things to include or work into your blog, stories, novels, or what ever you are writing.

But here's the thing, what started out as an exercise in creativity for me, turned into an exercise in gratitude. It was a great reminder of all the little things that I love about everyday life.  Those small, gratifying moments that are so simple but oh so sweet. I highly suggest that you make your own list--here's my list to help you start on yours. Enjoy :)

1. the feel of Jim's hand in mine
2. Duncan's "mmmmwha" noise when he kisses me
3. warm, chocolate chip cookies when they are fresh out of the oven and the chocolate is still gooey.
4. hugging, shaking hands, high 5's, to all my seniors as they get ready to graduate.
5. the face my students make when they finally get a concept--that a-haa moment.
6. watching it snow and it's quiet.
7. after the Christmas tree is finally decorated and I turn off the lights and just look.
8. snuggling under the covers
9. a really good cup of tea.
10. finishing a book
11. Duncan's belly laugh--it's just so wonderful to hear.
12. winning a really tough Words with Friends game
13. talking to my sister on the phone every week
14. Birthdays and anything birthday related.
15. the smell of roses, magnolias, or lilacs
16. old family pictures
17. Santa Claus
18. when something is on sale that I wasn't expecting.
19. snow days
20. caramel caribou ice cream
21. getting an email from one of my friends who I haven't heard from in a while
22. Thank yous
23. watching Jim and Duncan play chase.
24. sand in my toes
25. fall colors
26. Black Bear dates
27. the social studies bubble (how I miss you!)
28. Wicked
29. freshly washed and changed sheets
30. falling asleep to the sound of rain
31. Jesu Joy of Man's Desiring by Bach
32. my nestie buddies
33. stay in your pjs days
34. my danskos (oh do my feet love you)
35. my mom's parmesan bread
36. the hymn, Hail thee, festival day (my favorite)
37. spell and grammar check
38. cookie monster because C is for cookie and that's good enough for me ;)
39. breakfast for dinner
40. watching the wildlife in our back yard
41. long hot showers
42. a good movie that I can watch over and over
43. that knowing wink Jim gives me
44. crossing off the last thing on a to do list (really crossing off anything on my to do list!)
45. comfy clothes a.k.a. my sweat pants and a hoodie
46. hiking up Mt. Cutler trail in North Cheyenne Canyon Park
47. fireworks
48. Vera Bradley
49. west wing marathons (on tv and on from my dvds)
50. when people comment on my facebook page and pictures, and now on my blog!
51. the warmth from my mothers hug
52. watermelon, pineapple, and cantaloupe
53. hearing the right song just at the right time
54. how my hair looks and feels right after I get it done at the salon
55. a good pedicure
56. teacher friends who understand (you know who you are!)
57. Pachelbel's Cannon in D
58. sunshine on my face
59. a really good cheeseburger with mustard and pickles
60. speaking of pickles...fried pickles
61. my great grandmother's ring that has been passed to me by my mom
62. funny stories that make me laugh
63. National Board Certification
64. ice tea
65. crockpot dinners
66. Calvin and Hobbes comics
67. that tingly feeling you get when something amazing and beautiful happens
68. when Duncan captures my face between his hands so he can talk to me
69. the lil' gym
70. beautiful warm sunny days
71. reading with Duncan
72. cat naps
73. chocolate, chocolate, did I mention chocolate?
74. former students who keep in touch and let me know how they are
75. Napoleon Dynamite -- GOSH!
76. fresh cut veggies and ranch dip
77. salted caramel hot chocolate
78. the start of a new school year
79. the end of the school year
80. the Constitution
81. my wireless mouse
82. best friends
83. my wedding ring
84. Jim's support when I am stressed or frustrated
85. learning something new
86. family dinners
87. finding money or change in pockets
88. Coast Guard festival
89. McKenzie's Chop House white cheddar garlic mash potatoes
90. discovering a new love, idea, or passion
91. Charlie Brown and Snoopy specials on tv
92. childrens artwork
93. finding a bargain
94. snow angels
95. when all the traffic lights are green on my way to work
96. sound of waves crashing against the shore
97. my mother-in-law's zany, funny sense of humor
98. playing the piano
99. Cardinal's baseball and Detroit hockey
100. Ants on a log (celery stuffed with peanut butter and raisins)

An attitude of gratitude.

So I have really been thinking about the idea of happiness lately. Am I really happy? Sure I'm happy that my husband cleaned up the dishes last night and that Dunc finally slept through the night, but really.. is that all it is about? Then I read that  researchers believe that showing gratitude is the single most effective way to to increase happiness. And who couldn't use a little more happiness in their life? I know I could! So that got me thinking about the whole concept of gratitude--I ended up creating a doodle web (see below) as I thought about the whole idea. Could it really be this easy? This just called out "experiment time" .... hmmmm.

My gratitude mind map/doodle. It's scary sometimes where my mind goes....

Before I started, I had to figure out just exactly what gratitude is. I'm a teacher so I did what I tell my students to do all the time--"look it up".. According to Merriam Webster's Online Dictionary, the word gratitude comes from the Latin words: gratia (meaning favor, charm, and thanks) and gratus (meaning pleasing and grateful). In easy English--it's expressing thanks for gifts we have received.

Back to my experiment. Time to show my gratitude. I've started off slow, thanking my husband for picking up his clothes (which really does mean a lot to me since it drives me nuts when he leaves them all around the house), including in my prayers my gratitude for the gifts that I do have (a home, both Jim and I having jobs we love, a wonderful family), sending a thank you note to a friend just for being my friend,  and even going as far as calling up my mom to thank her for all the baby/toddler and how to handle sickness advice she has given me in the last few months. This was important to me since it feels like I am calling her at least twice a week with questions. And do you know what--it is working! I am finding that by sharing my gratitude, it makes me feel good and the one I share with happy... and when they are happy, they share their happiness with me too. (Or in the case of my husband, it makes him more inclined to keep picking up his clothes, which REALLY makes me happy!) It's like a big circle and all I know is I want to keep it going.

So, what does this mean for you and me? Simple... If someone has been kind, thank him or her... today. Sure, you can wait and buy that person dinner next week, but how about writing an e-mail this afternoon or leaving a voice-mail message telling them how much you appreciate the kind words or deeds? When we show our gratitude, it's a way of sharing our joy with that person. It strengthens not only our faith and happiness, but theirs too. And who knows, you might just remind them to show their gratitude, too.

Start today and  make a commitment to show your gratitude by sharing it with others whenever you have the opportunity. Find a way to demonstrate your gratitude to the universe. Feed the birds! Pick up trash or volunteer your time.  Action gives life to ideas. When we start to look for ways to show our gratitude, we will find more and more to be grateful for.

Oh, and by the way... thank you so much for taking the time to read this as I start my blogging journey--it really does mean a lot to me. :)